Comedy Quotes & Jokes / page 644
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife? Bullshit! You covet his wife, his house, his car, and his pool. You know why? Because he's coveting every inch of your shit, pal!
But our country's equivalent of gritty reality is more like "Look out Sarge, he's got a shooter!"
Even though your kids will consistently do the exact opposite of what you're telling them to do, you have to keep loving them just as much.
I have emotional needs that I didn't know I had, and I have physical needs that I didn't know weren't really needs.
I always rib people, but nobody ever gives me a hard time. I don't know why. Maybe they're afraid of what I might say. There's probably a lesson in that somewhere, but I don't know what it is.
I was student council president in high school, and even in law school, I was vice-president of the student bar association.
But sports photography isn't something you just pick up overnight. You can't do it once a year for fun and expect to do a good job. And I take pride in what I do.
Mr Gallop you have a beautiful tale there. If you wear your coat long enough no one will notice it.
I live in New York right now but I'm originally from my daddy's nuts. We all are. Think about, we the lucky ones - we made it. You all are winners. That's the first race you ever won.