Comedy Quotes & Jokes / page 644
The game of comedy is all about owning the stage, and from a physical point of view, it's beneficial that I am a larger man. From my lumbering presence alone, I can't really help *but* dominate the stage.
Taking into account the public's regrettable lack of taste, it is incumbent upon you not to fit in.
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but screw it, i’m with "Bupa".
I get stressed out hearing Lindsey Buckingham talk about those days cause what I'm thinking... I don't know how he can't go 'And that's right before Mick Fleetwood fucked my girlfriend.
You might be a redneck if your kids take a siphon hose to "Show and Tell."
'Several NFL players said they would support a team mate that came out as gay...' Yeah, why wouldn't you?!
Fame for me is like a place, a country I'm taking a tour through.
I think that sometimes I’ve been a little too nice. I think you have to have a balance. When you’re too nice people take you for granted, they take you for a fool I think.
So I do have this ambivalence. Obviously I'm against militaries, because of what militaries do. In many ways though, the air force was unmilitary-like. They dropped bombs on people, but... they had a golf course.
It's tough having the last name Rickles. Luckily, my kids handled it great.
That would be a good public service announcement for Nickelodeon: "Hi, this is Bob Saget. Don't fuck that shit. Stay in school. And read!"