Quotes & Jokes about Audience / page 3
I had a porn star in the audience the other night, and she really doesn’t like performing sex scenes. She says, “I fake my orgasms. I can’t wait for this to get off me. And all I can think about is getting paid and having dinner later.” I said, “Wow! I’m married to a porn star!”
The street in the center of town was Butts road. I stole the sign and told the audience, this must be where the assholes live. I also had a Neighborhood Crime Watch - it takes about 20 seconds to break into a house but it took me an hour to unbolt this sign.
I would not have had anything to eat if it weren't for the stuff the audience threw at me.
Be prepared to cut your little extra lines that come after a big punchline and move on to the next joke or routine to give your set more punch and crispness. You can keep them in your set, but if the audience applauds your big line, don’t do your tag when it dies down, just move on.
The worst thing that can happen to a comedian is to do a documentary on your life and you're watching it with an audience and there's not a laugh.
Just me onstage with a mike having an intimate relationship with the audience. I don't get nervous for that. I just get excited.
It’s better to play to the host as though in a real conversation and let the audience listen in- which they are.
As rewarding as a good film role can be, there is just nothing like getting up on a stage and taking an audience for a ride. You make a movie, and the audience may not see it for another 10 months. Here, you know immediately their reaction.
Doing panel well is actually more important than doing a good stand-up spot because it’s when the audience observes you in a more “conversational” mode and decides if they like your personality – which is one of the real keys to popularity.
I've always been fascinated by the difference between the jokes you can tell your friends but you can't tell to an audience. There's a fine line you have to tread because you don't know who is out there in the auditorium. A lot of people are too easily offended.
It's a simple and an effective way of getting everyone on the same page, prepared and paying attention to the gag. People just get into that frame of mind of you doing impressions. It can take a minute or two for an audience to catch on when you aren't doing one.
I think comedy evolves constantly. I reinvent myself all the time. I always find a way to entertain myself because I truly believe you have to entertain yourself in order to relate it the right way to your audience.
My material is as new as anything on the dinner table. What difference does it make if I'm 70 or if I'm 20? The audience knows they aren't getting any old stories from me.
I think it’s appropriate to start off with a rape joke. It’s good to find out what kind of audience I’m dealing with.