Quotes & Jokes by Sandra Bernhard
Madonna's got one big choice. Take a couple of years off and become a human being.
New York has always been a sense of eclectic kind of freedom and expression on a lot of different levels.
I really, really love Hilary Clinton. I think she's very cool. She's out there and she's involved.
Of course, everybody's family is dysfunctional - we've accepted that. What are we supposed to do? Hate our parents for the rest of our lives?
When you have a knowledge of history, it's very soothing. When there's continuity in your life, it's soothing.
Ellen's very mad at me. She's says if I want to start a war in the press, she's not the person to start with.
I'm the only actress in Hollywood who didn't pay to have these lips.
I think people are a little bit intimidated by me. You know, I'm not exactly a wilting flower, so I think they're a little bit scared of me sometimes.
They want families to come to New York and go to the theater, so the theater is all geared toward family entertainment. It's money, you know.
Purim, one of my favorite holidays. It's like the original drag queen's holiday. It's when all the Jewish men go for it and feel no guilt for a change.
My father was a proctologist; my mother was an abstract artist. That's how I view the world.