Quotes & Jokes about Dating / page 5
I will probably have sex with Eminem after the show is over. Probably, I don't see why I wouldn't. I'm fair game, its not like I'm that picky, you've seen the guys I've dated. I like Swizz Beatz, just because I would like to yell out in bed, Swizz Beatz! Keep it coming!
I ran into a woman I dated last year. I said, "You gave me a rash!" She said, "Put something on it." I said, "OK. Ten bucks says it was you."
I was going to get me a white woman, but O.J. messed it up for everybody. He set interracial dating back a thousand years.
Called a blind date to set up a meeting at a restaurant. I said, "I'll be the one driving the Mercedes and wearing a Rolex." Never found her, but when I got home my place was robbed.
I tell ya, my wife was never nice. On our first date, I asked her if I could give her a goodnight kiss on the cheek - she bent over!
I believe that if you go on a date and get to second base and then you go home alone and rub one out, that’s like runs batted in.
You have the attention span of a large bug, and yet I don't feel good enough about myself to not date you.
I had a date with an inflatable girl. Now I got an inflatable guy looking for me.
I used to date a girl from Buffalo. Why can't I meet a girl with normal parents?
My theory about Taylor Swift is that she's a virgin, that everyone breaks up with her because they date her for two weeks and she's like, 'I'm not gonna do it'.
Men don't realize that if were sleeping with them on the first date, were probably not interested in seeing them again either.
Here's how hot my wife is: on our first date, she started talking about kids. Christopher Titus: And I still married her.