Quotes & Jokes about Age / page 3

46 quotes

Age to me means nothing. I can't get old; I'm working. I was old when I was twenty-one and out of work. As long as you're working, you stay young. When I'm in front of an audience, all that love and vitality sweeps over me and I forget my age.

To me, the most important thing in this age is just to let people be.

Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.

A lot of people my age think stand up sucks.

How young can you die of old age?

Obviously, at this age, I've lost people in my life. But with a parent, it's just different. I was very attached to my father and had this naive little-girl notion that he'd always be around. So I'm finding acceptance of my father's death is the hardest thing to accept.

Everyone says that looks don't matter, age doesn't matter, money doesn't matter. But I never met a girl yet who has fallen in love with an old ugly man who's broke.

Don't talk to me about Valentines Day. At my age an affair of the heart is a bypass!

At my age, making love is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.

I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.

I don't know how you feel about old age... but in my case I didn't even see it coming. It hit me from the rear.

The fashion magazines are suggesting that women wear clothes that are 'age appropriate'. For me that would be a shroud.

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

I don't feel old. I don't feel anything till noon. That's when it's time for my nap.

Women my age just don't turn me on. That's another problem with getting older. I took out an older woman the other night, and I mean old. I told her, "Act your age." She died.