Quotes & Jokes about Business / page 6
You know, I've always wanted to be a young Charles Kuralt. I started in this business with just a Winnebago and a dream.
I was in front of an ambulance the other day, and I noticed that the word "ambulance" was spelled in reverse print on the hood of the ambulance. And I thought, "Well, isn't that clever." I look in the rear-view mirror; I can read the word "ambulance" behind me. Of course while you're reading, you don't see where you're going, you crash. You need an ambulance. I think they're trying to drum up some business on the way back from lunch.
Show business is my life. When I was a kid I sold insurance, but nobody laughed.
You hear entertainers all the time, saying, 'If I couldn't get paid for this, I'd do it for free.' When's the last time you ever heard a business person say, 'If I couldn't get paid for being chairman of British Petroleum, I'd do it for free'?
The best thing I ever heard about doing comedy is that it’s the "business of rejection".
Some are from the world of the arts, some from the fields of business, architecture, wine-making and education. What they have in common is that they are all known nationally - and many internationally - for their wide-ranging achievements.
No, even when you're making fun of people in this business, they want to take credit for it. That's how big the egos are.
There's no doubt about it, show business lures the people who didn't get enough love, attention, or approval early in life and have grown up to become bottomless, gaping vessels of terrifying, abject need. Please laugh.
"This is no way to run a business," I told Dim Sum, and then looked at Tons of Fun. "And you might want to lay off the carbs, you fucking wildebeest."
I'm so secretive that when someone asks me, "Hey, can you keep a secret?" I say "That's none of your business."
I want to tell my jokes. I want to have time with my children. I want to entertain people. And at one point, I'll walk away from show business. But I don't want to walk away empty-handed.
I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson.
Of course in show business there are two ways to play it and I am not politically correct so I am not going to get endorsements or anything like that.