Quotes & Jokes about Business / page 7
"This is no way to run a business," I told Dim Sum, and then looked at Tons of Fun. "And you might want to lay off the carbs, you fucking wildebeest."
I want to tell my jokes. I want to have time with my children. I want to entertain people. And at one point, I'll walk away from show business. But I don't want to walk away empty-handed.
What's so touching is the way we fight the war right until the moment our business is taken care of and then we turn on a dime and we immediately start taking care of people. It's like a shock and aw shucks campaign.
If you have an entry-level position at a fertilizer company, you are literally in the asshole of the shit business.
I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson.
When I got back into show business in 1961, I felt - for obvious reasons - that nothing in my life went right, and I realized that millions of people felt the same way. So when I first came back my catch phrase was "nothing goes right." Early on, that was my setup for a lot of jokes.
I got screwed when my parents passed away. They left me their unfinished business.
In what other business can a guy my age drink martinis, smoke cigars and sing? I think all people who retire ought to go into show business. I've been retired all my life.
Raising children is an incredibly hard and risky business in which no cumulative wisdom is gained: each generation repeats the mistakes the previous one made.
The only thing harder than leaving show business is coming back.
It's just such a gross business. I see why people get eaten from the inside out. Even when it's going well it's hard to deal with.