Quotes and Jokes by Bob Hope

Leslie Townes Hope, KBE, KC*SG, KSS, known professionally as Bob Hope, was an English-American stand-up comedian, vaudevillian, actor, singer, dancer, athlete, author and centenarian.

Top 15 Most Popular Quotes (out of 119)

#1

I feel very humble, but I think I have the strength of character to fight it.

60
#2

I love flying. I've been to almost as many places as my luggage.

42
#3

Welcome to the Academy Awards - or as it`s known at my house, Passover.

41
#4

Elvis is just a young, clean-cut American boy who does in public what everybody else does in private.

38
#5

You can always tell when a man's well-informed. His views are pretty much like yours.

25
#6

I thought 'Deep Throat' was a movie about a giraffe.

24
#7

I'm so old they've canceled my blood type.

22
#8

As soon as the war ended, we located the one spot on earth that hadn't been touched by the war and blew it to hell.

18
#9

No one party can fool all of the people all of the time; that's why we have two parties.

18
#10

I'll tell 'ya how to stay young: Hang around with older people.

15
#11

If you haven't got any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart trouble.

14
#12

A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live.

14
#13

Virus is a Latin word used by doctors to mean 'your guess is as good as mine.'

13
#14

My next door neighbor just had a pacemaker installed. They're still working the bugs out, though. Every time he makes love, my garage door opens.

12
#15

Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens.

12