Comedy Quotes & Jokes / page 1079
I feel sorry for high school teams still named the Cougars. Now what does the coach say? "Get out there and play like horny old ladies!"
You might be a redneck if your soap on a rope doubles as an air freshener.
If God had intended us not to masturbate he would've made our arms shorter.
Sex is like having dinner: sometimes you joke about the dishes, sometimes you take the meal seriously.
We need more people speaking out. This country is not overrun with rebels and free thinkers. It's overrun with sheep and conformists.
I understand dildos: not everybody has fifteen inches of dick to swing around to scare the children.
Whosoever shall not fall by the sword or by famine, shall fall by pestilence so why bother shaving?
In spite of the poor economy, almost 70 percent of Americans occasionally splurge on luxury items - like a blanket on a plane, or a peanut.
