Quotes & Jokes about Politics / page 2

95 quotes

I don't think the Tea Party and Glenn Beck are responsible for one man's mental illness. Jared Lee Loughner, Arizona congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords' alleged assassin, was a psychopath. They didn't even know if the congresswoman was dead or not when they started saying that this was the result of volatile political rhetoric. What the fuck are they talking about? Every logical faction has come out and said that this psycho didn't watch the news, he wasn't a political junkie, he was far beyond that. We have to tone down political rhetoric.

Imagine my surprise when it turned out the main thing that I was qualified for was to get another degree and teach Political Science to other people, who would, in turn, teach it to other people! This wasn't higher education, this was Amway with a football team!

To me, political office should be like jury duty. You should just get a notice in mail one day and be like, "I’m Secretary of State next month!"

I can't talk politics with my cousin because he's such a hypocrite. He's against the death penalty and he hanged himself.

The wussification of America is killing us by teaching us to censor ourselves from what we believe. That’s why I want to see political correctness die in my lifetime, but first... I want to watch it suffer.

Political discourse has been reduced to "Where's the beef?" "Read my lips," and "Make my day." Where are the assassins when we really need them?

Politics move, as fast as Twitter, and for everyone to think that in four years America was going to be perfect is ridiculous.

Politics is just show business for ugly people.

I think most politicians are bisexual than bipartisan.

So what happens when nerds all get rich is: there’s a politics to it. Where there is money there is power. So then everyone else is like: “Hey nerds are great!”

Just honest. To me, being 'politically incorrect' means the opposite of being political - which means to spin everything. That's all it's ever meant to me. It's never meant liberal or conservative. It means honest.

If I was to really get at the burr in my saddle, it’s not politics - and this is, I think, probably a horrible analogy - but I look at politicians as, they are doing what inherently they need to do to retain power. Their job is to consolidate power. When you go to the zoo and you see a monkey throwing poop, you go, ‘That’s what monkeys do, what are you gonna do?’ But what I wish the media would do more frequently is say, 'Bad monkey.'

The way to stop political correctness is to not do it. If someone says, "You offended me" then you say "I don’t care!" If they’re offended by the truth, that’s their issue!

I call him Governor Bush because that's the only political office he's ever held legally in this country. I don't care where they hang his portrait, I don't care how big his library is. To me, he'll always be "Governor Bush." I don't even capitalize his name when I type it anymore.

The thing is, I hate political comedy. I personally loathe it.