Quotes & Jokes about Complaints

36 quotes

Most modern girls don’t really know what hiking is. To the average girl, hiking is: you wake up whenever you want; you put on Lululemon ‘cause they make your butt look unreasonably good - and they should for 800 fucking dollars - and you go for a walk in the park with your best friend and complain about how hungover you are. That’s hiking.

You can never make a woman happy, it's impossible. I've never met a happy woman in my life. They're always complaining about something.

So he says My wife's a pain in the ass. She's always busting my friggin' agates. My daughter's married to a real loser bastard. And I got a rash so bad on my ass I can't even sit down. But you know me. I can't complain.

I can't complain about my career, that's for sure.

Scientists are complaining that the new Dinosaur movie shows dinosaurs with lemurs, who didn't evolve for another million years. They're afraid the movie will give kids a mistaken impression. What about the fact that the dinosaurs are singing and dancing?

Here's the thing about Apple, we complain and they give us more battery life. We complain and they'll give us more stuff. Everything's beta right now. Everything's experimental. They really don't know what people want.

Like this girl said, after she caught me using her tooth brush. I said Why are you complaining? 30 mins ago you were licking my ass.

My neighbor complains every time my girlfriend and I have sex. We're not even that loud. But he used to date my girlfriend.

Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.

Women complain about PMS, but I think of it as the only time of the month when I can be myself.

Be happy with your stereotype. Asians - that's the stereotype I want. Being the smartest person in the world? You're the smartest, what are you complaining about? You know what I get? 'Wassup?'

If I stop complaining I'll have nothing to compain about.

A guy complains of a headache. Another guy says, "Do what I do. I put my head on my wife's bosom, and the headache goes away." The next day, the man says, "Did you do what I told you to?" "Yes, I sure did. By the way, you have a nice house!"

Where else but in America could the women's liberation movement take off their bras, then go on TV to complain about their lack of support?

A friend is someone I complain to about my other friends.